Castlevania: Season 1 Review

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Hell hath no fury like a vampire scorned…

 

Castlevania was an unknown world to me about 12 hours ago. To speak bluntly, I think vampires are dumb and castles are dated, but I’ve always viewed the franchise as something iconic. Thing is, to me, iconic don’t mean a damn thing. I still never touched the games because everyone looked too Victorian-y. I regret that now. For so long, I’ve stuck my tongue out at something that went on to be the source material for the fantastic story I watched unfold on my laptop tonight.

Netflix’s Castlevania was an excellent start to something that could end up being big. What I watched for eighty-odd minutes was enthralling and entertaining, and the hybrid of Game of Thrones and Attack on Titan that I never knew I wanted. It wasn’t perfect, but it was an adventure that deserved your focus, and sometimes that’s enough. Be it the characters that compliment each other like poison to a blade, or the origin as to why everything went to shit, everything was well told, just not told for long enough.

While it’s only been out for a weekend, the show has gained mass appeal and Netflix has already confirmed that it’s coming back for round two with double the episodes. Why have they already doubled down on the number of episodes? Because, as you sit there watching what may be your new favorite show of the summer, it’s pulled out of your embrace at the end of episode four.

Seriously, they roll the credits right as you meet the third member of the team, a ragtag medieval strike force that’s assembled to take down fucking Dracula and we’re supposed to just be cool with it. You can’t just do that! Right as you had everyone hooked, you reel in?

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I was disappointed when things came to a swift, four-episode conclusion, but I can only imagine there were larger puppet strings being pulled at Netflix. It’s a scary thing, someone saying they want to make an anime adaption of a video game series. Video game adaptations have enough stigmas as is, turning it into an anime may have really gritted some teeth in the boardroom.

Season length aside, I’m glad that Castlevania is getting the recognition that it deserves. In the four episodes that it devotes to its more-or-less prequel story, we’re presented with some well-written dialogue that’s performed incredibly well by the voice talent, all around making for some kickass characters that do just that: kick fucking ass.

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I don’t know how true this is to the source material, but the main protagonist, Trevor Belmont just barely gives a damn about saving the world. He’s standoffish, and a bit of a drunk asshole, but only because of the convictions that the world has put upon his family name. While this mindset directs most of his behavior, he doesn’t allow all of his humanity to be devastated in this world where so little of it is already left. We see him carry the weight of his excommunication like a curse, but we see him strike back at the true evils of Dracula’s army to defend those that would call him the monster.  Trevor Belmont is a great protagonist in that he’s not a good guy, but a guy who doesn’t want to be bad.

The origin of Dracula’s hate for mankind is given a face, and it allows for a story in which Dracula is sending bat-people to cut farmers in half, but we still can’t help but feel for the guy. Like Frankenstein, a monster is made in Dracula, not born. He’s almost unseen in the latter half of the first semi-season, but he was our first true protagonist in a lot of ways. We rooted for him, even as he was burning mankind to the ground. It’ll be very interesting to see if his reign is all-consuming, even of himself.

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Castlevania’s animation is a weak element, but it’s stylistic. The voice acting and set design make up for the world where otherwise you’d think it felt weak. There’s a good bit of violence and gore, which I don’t know how normal that is for an anime. I, uh, don’t watch too many, so it felt jarring in all the right ways to see violence portrayed in that kind of medium. I don’t know, maybe I’m a weirdo.

I highly recommend the first season of Castlevania to anybody who may be looking for a taste of epic, gut-covered adventure before Game of Thrones returns. While I have minor complaints, my biggest irk is in the poor structure of the season. I can’t seem to shake it. Instead of our three heroes walking into the sunset after a climactic victory, they walk forward, onward to the fight that hasn’t even begun yet. There’s a fantastic story here, we may just have to wait a bit longer to begin to enjoy it.

Oh, and I still think vampires are fucking dumb.

Castlevania: Season 1 — 8/10

The Wallow: Gator Has Big Plans

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Hey yo. Thanks for reading this and everything else. I also appreciate everybody who keeps tuning into my website to read up on my Mass Effect Andromeda continuation. I’m getting pretty good traffic so far!

I had a friend point out to me that it’s essentially glorified fan fiction, but I have to disagree with the “glorified” part. It’s smut of the imagination. I worked hard on it, but it’s not winning any writing awards. I’ll be adding part two shortly–stay tuned.

But that isn’t what I’m here to talk about. I have a new video coming out tomorrow–or technically today. It’s a small one and it’s more of an announcement for a larger video to follow. I’ve got about 40 minutes of content so far, but I think you’ll like this smaller 3-minute video first. Some cool stuff may be coming your way.

So be sure to check out my channel tomorrow, which is Monday. Your day is probably going to shit, meaning that a week of hell is ahead, so you may as well waste a few minutes on what I have to announce. I hate that word: announce. Get off your high horse, Gator.

At the time of writing this, which is about 3am on Monday morning. I’m sitting at 199 subscribers. I can’t fucking believe that, and the growth that I’ve seen in just a short month is incredible. I really, really fucking appreciate it. If you’re here from other means, be sure to check out my channel here.

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Gator is growing

For posterity, I’d like to keep a record of how things grow on my Youtube channel. I’m going to be starting a page on Story Swamp that’ll show how the growth happened. That way when I’m a fucking Kingpin, I can look back at this page, whiskey in hand, and remember all the souls I had to consume to reach my level of prestige.

This will also be to save my roommate from the constant subscriber updates. I think out of the 150-ish that have subscribed since my final MEA video, he’s been informed of 130 of them individually each time I get the notification. I think he’s going to kill me.

Finally, I’ve been asked by a few subscribers to update more regularly somewhere. I think they mean more videos, but those suckers take like, hours of my life. I love doing them, but I promise you I’m going at a rate that’s fast while also making sure I’m keeping my big belly filled.

So written reviews are what it’s all about. I had announced that I was going to be doing that, I just needed some time to get my fucking life together. I’ll be posting my first review right after this is going up. For those of you who are watching tomorrow’s video and reading this, hell yeah. Good to see you. Check out my review of the Netflix show, Castlevania that’s floating around here on the front page. You’ll also be able to use the “Review” tag on the left. I plan on making one review a week, plus I’ll link to the handful of entertainment websites that I work for.

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I’m a really big fan of keeping things all under one roof. I switched to Google Music just so it could be under my Google Play umbrella. I tried to then switch over to Google Books as well, but FUCK Google Books. It’s all about that self-published naughty-girl choking shit on Amazon.

This website is my roof. I’m bringing everything together. Those of you who’ve helped me get this far, I fucking love you. Let’s keep it going.

The Wallow: Gator Talks About E3

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Alright, so here’s what’s up: I love this fucking blog. It looks good and I get a little bit of a hard-on to see it grow, so I’m keeping the train a’rollin.

The best way that I can keep a steady buzz off of this is through a bi-weekly post about what this fat fuck has been up to.

The Wallow will be that weekly post, goddammit.

A lot of my friends post pictures or Europe or a wedding shower, but I usually avoid long-term commitments like the plague, so don’t expect to read much about my recent trip to Guatemala because it never happened–probably never will.

But what you will read about is what I’ve been soaking my eyes in, whether that’s a game or a show, even just some bullshit at the bar. I go there a lot and usually stay too long.

For the inaugural Wallow, I’m thinking E3 is a good jumping off point. While I’m a card-carrying dork–no doubt, I never really get that pumped about E3. I think it’s a little overdone, and to the people who don’t give a shit about games, it sure gives them a whole bunch of ammunition to say it’s a silly culture. Which, it is. Just look how the people who do care about this shit react.

Even though I consider it a deflating experience, I’m looking forward to quite a bit that was shown at E3. Here’s a list of what I’m looking forward to and why.

A Way Out looks potentially dope. Prison breaks make for really fun narratives and if the co-op is done well instead of, you press this button when I do too, then we could be in for a treat.

What’s so surprising to me is that nobody did this earlier. Off the top of my head, only a few games have even come close. Kayne and Lynch had a level revolving around a prison break in their first game and I remember enjoying it quite a bit. Yeah, I was one of 16 people on the planet to enjoy the K&L games. Then there was also a mission in Splinter Cell: Double Agent about flying the coop, but I only barely remember it.

It’s funny, both of those are games that I tried to go back and play recently but couldn’t get reinvested in. Kane and Lynch, I’m sorry to say, has aged like dogshit on a Texas sidewalk in July–so, so bad. I still have fond memories of those games, but that’s what they’ll stay; memories.

Similar story with Double Agent, though, it’s not as aged. It’s just got the look of a game that belongs on a Gamecube, and who am I to try to play a PC port? Just didn’t feel right, I guess.

But yeah, A Way Out. It should be really cool to see if they can take true co-op play and make it work in a fast-paced environment. All I can ask is that there’s a story to boot. Little bit of Shawshank Redemption mixed with some Army of Two really doesn’t sound that bad.

Hell, I’ll be extra impressed if a whole bunch of Swedes can do justice to a story that’s based in the American South/Southwest. It’s from the guys that did Brothers, right? The internet won’t shut up about that game, so hopefully, it turns out swell.

Controversy be damned, I can’t wait to see how The Last Night turns out. I have never, ever seen a trailer as atmospheric as that.

Dude, like that’s masterful, in my opinion. You see segments of a journey, a protagonist who’s taking his lickings, all while a world is being established. As far as trailers go, it did exactly what it needed to. Show, but not tell, and even then, only show a little.

The visuals too. The way lighting is used in and around the retro look is eye-widening for sure. It may look to borrow too much from Bladerunner, but if there’s a complaint to have, it’s that something is too much like Bladerunner. 

I’m not even touching on that Gamergate shit, by the way. I don’t even think that word should exist. Fuck both sides of that controversy. I’m uneducated, I’m naive, but I’m not interested in learning another bit about that nonsense. I hope the history books will mock this era for letting that grow to the size it did.

Alright, one thing about it: That dude shouldn’t have apologized for words he said three years ago. Regardless of whether he meant those things then and didn’t mean them now, you do not bend like that. Not like that.

Back to the game itself, I want to see some actual gameplay before really biting my tongue and jumping up and down. Great, great, potential, but I’ve been hurt before.

Finally, there’s Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus, which will be in my library on the day of release. I tend not to pre-order–not because I’m some kind of purist, I just don’t see the point, but I’ll buy this one as soon as I see the words, “Available Now” on ol’ Steam.

For those of you who played The New Order, the aesthetic is back in full and that was my favorite part of the 2014 title. Bethesda and Machine Games, they’ve done a great job at making the atmosphere for these games so dreadfully inviting.

It’s seen in the austerity of post-victory Berlin, rising just above the sunken, deteriorating hideout of the resistance. A titanic, continent-connecting bridge, but one only created to make genocide more convenient. The New Order was perfect at setting the stage. It’s sequel looks to show us the plagued heartland of America, and I look forward to seeing how it turns out.

Wolfenstein was never something that appealed to me when I was younger. It’s been around forever, but they made a couple of PS2-era games that always just seemed too dark to me. I don’t mean like pry-your-eyeballs out dark, I mean like visually too dark. I’ve never been into gothic looking shit either, which is why I think these newer games finally brought me into the fold. For the most part, they’ve ditched the castles and moved into office buildings.

Bethesda’s showcase otherwise seemed a bit…redundant to me. All the titles they announced were just things the whole community was aware of. I guess Fallout VR will be cool, but I’ve spent enough time in Boston to not really have a pull to go back. That’s even more true for the northern region of Cyrodill. Stop making Skyrim, sweet Jesus.

Quickly, some other titles that stuck out to me were:

Far Cry 5 — More heartland-gone-wrong. I’m into it.

Crackdown 3 — If it’s more like the first one and nothing like the second one, it can’t fail.

Metro: Exodus — I’ve made it this far and haven’t been disappointed. We’ll see.

You know what’s interesting to me? Rockstar never shows up to these bs expos and usually still ends up with the most-anticipated title. Even though they’re balls deep in trying to win back their GTA V community after their little OpenIV scuffle, everyone will forgive and forget with the next Red Dead Redemption 2 trailer release. And as someone who neither cares nor plays modded GTA V, I’d hope we can get to that step sooner than later.

Anyway, there’s what I thought. There’s more to say but it’s nothing that can’t be found elsewhere. I’m staring down a pile of laundry that needs doing and half the reason I’ve written for so long is to put that off as much as I can. But I reached the end of that rope.

Peace,

Gator

Mass Effect: Assemblage (Intro & Prologue)

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So, this has been a long time in the works. Even having said that, I feel like I’ve just scratched the surface. For those of you who know me because of my Youtube videos, I hope my passion for Mass Effect is apparent. I love this franchise so much and I’m worried that with this week’s E3 announcement of Anthem, we may not be seeing its return for a long while.

But that doesn’t stop me from looking to the stars and writing down my thoughts. In the latter part of my video series on MEA, my head kept playing through potential storylines, ideas on what could make for a successful sequel.

Since my roommate is sick of me talking about this shit all the time, I’ve decided it’s your turn to hear my word vomit. I’m proud of it, but it’s surely got some plot holes–even for only being a prologue right now. But speaking of that, there’s a much larger doc (about 4000 words so far) that contains a more detailed telling of what’s summarized below. Check it out if you want to go deeper.

If you like it, please let me know, but I’d like critique more than thumbs up. It doesn’t stop here, so it’s best to catch faults early.

My sequel is called Mass Effect: Assemblage. It starts out badass and doesn’t stop. Enjoy.

Mass Effect: Assemblage

It’s been two years since the Archon’s defeat and things are progressing well on the artificial planet, Meridian. Instead of sprawling out across the cluster, all the races of the Initiative agreed to call Port Meridian home, as well as the Angarans. Even the Nexus landed within the artificial planet. The city is a testament to the Initiative’s founding principles.

But our new story doesn’t start there. Instead, we start in an Initiative craft, one that’s filled with some familiar faces. Keri T’vessa, Asari reporter who’s risen to the rank of ambassador; Nakmor Morda, leader of Krogan people who have since rejoined the Initiative; Tiran Kandros, Chief Security Officer for Port Meridian; Evfra de Tershaav, Angaran rebel-turned-emissary and former contact with Kadara Port; Cora Harper, the Pathfinder’s second-in-command. They all accompany our Pathfinder on a mission of peace, one to bring the exiled members of the Initiative back into the fold.

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The Bouy, Sanctum of the Holdouts

They’re going to meet with Kaetus and his Outcasts, broken free from his cell and running ever since, or Reyes Vidal and his Collective, last seen running with his tail between his feet from a cave in the wildlands of Kadara. (This is all dependent on who was left standing in MEA.)

They await for your party’s arrival in their new stronghold, a small Remnant station that floats on the edge of Helius space. While it was once highly-sought by the Initiative Technology Recovery Team, the council let it go once they heard that the holdouts were clinging to it with what strength they still had. Everyone in the cluster has come to call it the Buoy, on account of the blinking red light at the top. Besides that blinking light, the Remnant station seems to do absolutely nothing.

During these initial scenes, the Pathfinder makes it clear to those around him that SAM is no longer with him. We’re not given more information, and there’s some reservations in the Pathfinder’s voice.

While this trip is meant to reunite the exiles with the Initiative, a trap is sprung during the Pathfinder’s visit. The Primus, believed to be killed during the battle of the Keelah Si’Ya’s recovery is revealed to be rebuilding her dwindling numbers by mutating the holdouts and exalting them into kett. This was done by manipulating the leader–Kaetus or Reyes–into believing that they would be spared the kett’s wrath once they were at full power once more. As a result of the trap, Keri, Tiran, and Morda are taken for Exaltation. Humans, as it has been discovered, however, are much easier to turn into kett.

The Primus, Diminished Leader

On order of the Primus, the holdout leader attempts to inject the Pathfinder with the kett serum, but Evfra, now a loyalist to the Pathfinder’s cause interferes. Both the holdout leader and Evfra are infected with one serum each in the scuffle. Half the dosage isn’t enough to transform a human/turian, but it is enough to stop their heart. The holdout leader dies writhing on the floor. To an Angaran, the fate appears to be the same. Evfra is mutated into a pseudo-kett appearance before he dies as well.

In the scuffle, the Pathfinder and Cora break free. They give chase to the Primus but lose her on the way to the Exaltation Chambers were Keri, Tiran, and Morda are in the beginning processes of Exaltation. The Pathfinder, with the help of Cora, eliminates all of the kett that guard the captured party and they begin to release them from the Exaltation process.

Everyone is recovered, but in the short moment of celebration, the Primus makes herself known for a final confrontation. She shoots at the Pathfinder but hits Keri, wounding and incapacitating her. There’s a final battle where the entire party must fight, one that feels never ending. Ammo runs out, you feel like there’s no hope. Keri’s blood stains the floor. The Pathfinder shouts for SAM, “SAM, I need you, dammit!” There’s no response.

The Primus walks closer, her army of kett barraging ever-still. She’s going to inject the Pathfinder or make them her new puppet, a way to get onto Meridian and begin to amass an army that would put her past one to shame.

Naturally, the Pathfinder tells her to shove it.

When it looks like the Pathfinder and his team are truly doomed, from behind the advancing aggressors, we see a kett hand reach for a Gatling-like weapon. The alien activates the weapon and lays waste to his fellow kett from behind. As the bodies drop, we see that it’s no kett, but a half-consumed Evfra who’s fighting the serum’s effect. With only half the dosage it usually takes and no Exaltation, he seems to be winning.

Evfra, the Stricken

The Primus is realizing her reign is coming to an end, but like every great villain, there’s a contingency. Having plagued the Remnant core within the Buoy, she uses her Remnant drone to begin a meltdown process.

With Keri unconscious, Evfra in between bouts of seizing, and Cora gathering the remaining holdouts for extraction, the Pathfinder must make a choice. Two members of the party volunteer to stay and defuse the meltdown, but the others need to make their way to the ship in time. Tiran Kandros or Nakmor Morda are willing to try to put an end to things. In the two years since Port Meridian became their home, every member of the Initiative has become near-fluent in Remnant language. Nobody in this group is more suited than the other. Choosing who stays means their death, but they give everyone enough time to escape. The Buoy explodes in blue Remnant gas as the Initiative craft makes for deep space.

Aboard the Initiative craft, the Pathfinder looks around at his damaged crew. Evfra’s been tied down, seizing against the serum’s effect. Keri’s breathing is a whisper that’s getting quieter with every inhale. Cora is covered in battle scars, but tough as always. The remaining survivor is screaming that they should go back and insinuates that this is the Pathfinder’s fault.

 

One final shot of the Pathfinder’s face, determined and angry as hell before a cut to black. The title card fades in.

Mass Effect: Assemblage

Behind the fading title card, stars of the galaxy illuminate bright white against the black of space. They then transition to digitized blue, star charts on a computerized map. Letters and symbols appear beneath the stars, but it’s unrecognizable. One star pulses red. With each pulse, a sensor wave is sent out around and past the other stars. The pulse keeps expanding across the map until it hits an object that was not marked on the map. The Buoy’s explosion activated a Remnant sonar, showing that the small station had a purpose after all.

There’s a wheezing voice spoken at a whisper. It’s in a language we’ve never heard, but subtitles fill the bottom of the screen.

“The beacon, after all this time…”

Another voice.

“After so, so long…”

A long, skeletal digit comes into the view of the map. It’s withered, putrid. It clicks on the previously unmarked object that the beacon has uncovered. When the gangly digit makes contact, a projection of Meridian arises, the homeworld of the Initiative that belonged to someone else long, long ago…

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Meridian, the Stolen Homeworld

A cacophony of wheezes and whispers. More dagger-like fingers, too many to count, point to the map and slither over one another.

The wheezes sound malicious, filled with venom. The screen goes black once more.

“We have found you.”

END OF PROLOGUE

More in-depth version (very rough)

Part 2–the beginning of the game, I plan on publishing it within the next coming weeks. Follow me on Twitter so I can let you know when it drops. Peace.

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